


connection

by nico_niikura



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, First Meetings, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:06:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21527212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nico_niikura/pseuds/nico_niikura
Summary: Lando is excited to meet Max for the first time, but he worries that he won't like him. Little does Lando know, Max is having similar thoughts.
Relationships: Lando Norris/Max Verstappen
Comments: 10
Kudos: 64





	connection

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I just wanted to write a little thing that I've been thinking about for a while. I also wanted to touch on the possible mental illnesses I see in either driver. I am by no means saying they have these illnesses, but I'm just stretching my imagination to allow them to have these things.

Lando sat nervously in his desk chair, waiting for something, anything to happen. Well, he wasn't just waiting for anything. He was waiting for one thing. 

He kept reading his message over and over, wondering if it made sense, if it was interesting, if Max could tell he put too much thought into it. He didn't want to seem overbearing, but he couldn't help being anxious about every little thing. 

LNorris: r u up? i cant sleep

It was simple. Too simple. Maybe he wasn't descriptive enough? Maybe Max expected a longer message from him. Maybe Max wasn't even bothering to reply. It was half past two, three for Max, so maybe Max wasn't awake. That was a big possibility, something that loomed over Lando like a cliff. 

He tried to calm himself. Maybe Max just hadn't seen his message yet. Maybe he was busy doing something. Maybe he was drifting off, not necessarily asleep but not necessarily awake either. 

Lando shook his head. How could he have not seen his message yet? Maybe he was just ignoring him. There was a notification that always showed up on mobile, unless Max had his notifications off. That was a possibility. Then he  _ definitely _ wasn't going to see his message unless he was awake, which he probably wasn't. That could be the only explanation.

Lando didn't even notice the new message until his eyes scanned the screen.

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Yeah I'm up

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Barely tho

Lando let out a shaky breath of relief. He quickly typed a reply.

LNorris: i cant wait to see you tomorrow

Tomorrow was a totally different story. They were going to meet for the first time, and Lando could barely contain his excitement. Max was coming over from Monaco, and Lando was going to pick him up from the airport. It was crazy, considering they had been in a relationship for about six months. It didn't seem that long, as Lando looked back on it. It couldn't possibly have been so long.

Apparently, Max was also excited.

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Me neither, that's why I'm up lol

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Even tho my flight is in ten hours, I just can't sleep

Ten hours. Twelve hours was how long Lando had before he could see Max for the first time. Would Max like him? He didn't know. He didn't know if he wanted to know.

LNorris: neither can i

Lando paused before typing his second message.  _ Maybe I should put more thought into what I'm saying,  _ he thought _. _ He sat there briefly, thinking about all the things he could say. He could comment on Max being up late, or on what they were going to do tomorrow. He could comment on so many things, oh god. 

He decided to talk about what they were going to do tomorrow, but he still wasn't completely sure if that was the best thing to talk about. Maybe he was moving too fast?

LNorris: what do you think we should do tomorrow?

Typing, typing, typing. Would he ever stop typing? Maybe Lando had touched the wrong topic. He should of stayed on topic, about Max being up late. He shouldn't have jumped so readily into another topic. Was he crazy?

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Hmm, idk. What's there to do in your area?

LNorris: well, we did discuss playing video games or smthn

More typing. Lando was going insane. He just wanted to know Max's message right now. He didn't want to wait anymore. Was it so hard for him to press send? 

Max-Emilian Verstappen: We can do that. We could also go to like a coffee shop or something

Of course they could.

LNorris: that sounds good! 

He should say something else, anything. Not just leave him on a weird, upbeat note. 

LNorris: i know a few places in my area

LNorris: when i pick u up, we can go to one

There. That should do it. Lando hovered over the keyboard, unsure if he should say something else. He decided against it, realizing that it would be creepy if he were to text him multiple times for no reason. He should wait for Max's reply, not keep saying the same thing over and over again.

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Perfect

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Well, I shouldn't keep you up long. I'll see you tomorrow <3

He wanted to say something encouraging back, but he didn't know what. Maybe he shouldn't say anything at all? That wouldn't be polite. He should definitely say something. Even if it seems tacked on and lazy. 

He thought about it for several minutes, then wondered if Max was still awake. He had to be, right? He couldn't have gone to sleep that fast. Lando didn't know. He wanted to say something nice to end the conversation, but not overbearing. It was so hard, worrying about every little thing like he did. 

He decided to write down something that he wasn't completely sure about. Maybe he wanted to be a little bit risky, maybe a little bit overbearing. Not like Lando cared. He didn't care about that at all.

LNorris: love you

Oh no. He made a mistake. He shouldn't have said that. I mean, they usually said it to each other after calling, but he didn't want to be weird. Plus, it would be extra weird if Max didn't answer right away. Then it would seem unfinished, and like Lando had seriously fucked up. Usually Max was the one that said it first, but Lando wanted to take the initiative and say it first. He shouldn't have done that, he should have left the conversation where it was, and why was Max taking so long to respond? Maybe he didn't want to say it tonight, maybe he was-

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Love you too :)

\---

_ "Hey man, what's up?" _

_ I looked at him, smile on my face. "I'm so excited you're here!" I ran towards him, arms stretched out to hug him. _

_ He caught me, laughing softly at my reaction. He was so tall and handsome. I could barely believe what I was seeing. His chest was so warm and inviting, I couldn't help but snuggle into it. _

_ "Listen, I have something to tell you," Max said. I looked up at him, intrigued by what he was asking. _

_ "What is it?" _

_ "I've been playing you this whole time." _

_ I looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?" _

_ "I'm not gay, Lando. I never have been." _

_ My eyes widened at what I was hearing. What?  _

_ "Then what do I mean to you?" _

_ "Absolutely nothing. You never meant anything to me." _

_ He laughed a sick, loud laugh. I felt my stomach turning, and I couldn't help but feel nauseous and embarrassed. I can't believe it! All my worst fears have come true! He never really cared about me, of course. Why would he? _

_ The scene got darker and darker, swirling until there was nothing left. _

Lando woke up with his hair plastered to his forehead. He sat up, confused at why he was in his bed. He rubbed his eyes, then yawned. He then glanced at his phone, which was pulsing slightly.

6:24 am.

His thoughts drifted towards the dream he just had. He couldn't believe it, all of the things he was thinking about coming true in some sick fantasy. It was like his mind was constantly against him. 

He laid back down, his mind racing. He even felt a tear escape his eye. What if that was true? What if Max didn't like him, or was never actually gay to begin with? What if he had been playing him for the past six months? There was no reason he wouldn't.

Lando rolled over, shutting his eyes. He could see the scene play out again, the hug, Max's words, and the bitter sting of regret and embarrassment. He opened his eyes again. He really didn't feel like falling asleep again.

But he was oh so tired, so tired of constantly being awake. He had only been asleep for two hours. He had stayed awake scrolling through Max's Instagram, wondering what those strong arms would feel like around him, what that perfect chest would feel like pressed against his. There were so many things he couldn't help but imagine, so many things he wanted, so many things he felt before actually knowing how they felt. He wanted it so desperately to be real.

He blinked a couple of times, his mind drifting to better things. Max wouldn't do any of those things to him, would he? He was nice, and kind, and so wonderful. None of their relationship seemed fake. It all seemed so real.

Maybe too real.

He shook his head. He wanted those thoughts to go away. He didn't want to always worry about every little thing that happened. 

Before he knew it, he was starting to drift off again. Maybe this time, he would have a nice dream...

\---

Lando was standing in the baggage terminal, holding his phone up to his face. He was looking at Discord, the app they talked on the most, waiting for Max's message.

Max-Emilian Verstappen: I'm taking off, I'll let you know when I land

LNorris: ok! i love you!

LNorris: let me know when you land ok?

LNorris: have you landed yet?

Max-Emilian Verstappen: Yes, and I love you too

LNorris: let me know when you get off the plane

He was waiting for anything to happen. It seemed like deja vu, always waiting for something to happen. He was waiting for Max to start typing, or Max to send a message. Something like that. 

Max was typing. Oh, maybe he just got off! It seemed a lot later than it was supposed to be. Lando checked the time for the fiftieth time, wondering why he was 22 minutes late. The plane landed a while ago, they should be deplaning by now. Maybe they got stuck on the runway. Maybe Max had changed his mind, and he was booking another flight. Oh god, who knows what could be happening! Anything could be happening right now.

Max-Emilian Verstappen: You look even cuter in person

Lando looked up from his phone, confused. Then he spotted him.

He was standing a bit away from everything, suitcase by his side. He was so gorgeous, the way the bridge of his nose was shaped and how full his lips were. He was so tall and handsome, just like Lando had imagined. Oh god, and his hair was just perfect. Lando couldn't help but be awestruck by him.

Oh shit, he was walking over to him. He had a smile on his face. Lando just kept looking at him like a lost puppy right until he was right in front of him.

"Hi," Max said.

Lando broke a small smile, then it grew wider. He shoved his phone in his pocket and threw himself onto Max.

Max laughed, and Lando was suddenly reminded of his dream from the last night. Oh god, what if it was happening? He didn't want to be caught in a hard place and be embarrassed in front of everyone in the baggage claim. He held onto Max, feeling his soft warmth, praying that his dream wouldn't come true.

Instead of talking, Max hugged him back. It was so nice, finally being able to feel the person he had been with for six months. Lando didn't want it to end. He just wanted to stay in Max's embrace for as long as possible.

Lando finally let go, the warmth of Max dissipating a lot sooner than he wanted. He looked up at him, smiling like an absolute idiot. Oh Christ, he looked so stupid right now, didn't he?

"I can't believe you're really here," Lando found himself commenting.

Max laughed again. "I am here."

Oh, Lando was feeling so in love right now. He couldn't help but feel his heart skip a beat. It was wonderful, being with Max. He didn't care that they just met. It was beautiful. He was beautiful.

"Let's get out of here, shall we?"

Lando nodded. He was so fucking excited right now. Nothing could stop his mood. Not even the lingering thought of his dream.

It was a blur, going from the baggage claim to the car. Lando listened to Max talk about his plane ride, and for once everything felt normal. It was like they had always been like this, talking in real life face to face. It was like they had never been apart.

Max shoved his luggage into the back of Lando's McLaren, shutting the door when he was done. Lando walked to the drivers side of his car, and he had a moment with Max when he forgot that in England, they went in on the left instead of the right. Lando settled into the seat, waiting for Max to put on his seatbelt, and turned on the car.

Max whistled when the car roared to life. "This baby is hot," he said. "I have an Aston Martin at home, but this takes the cake."

Lando laughed a little, and pulled out of the parking space. He revved the engine a little bit, they drove out of the parking garage.

"So, where to?"

"There's a coffee shop in the town I live in that's pretty nice," Lando said. "It'll take a bit to get there though, since I don't live near Heathrow."

They made small talk while they made their way to the coffee shop. Lando couldn't help but fall in love with Max even more now that they were together. He was a dream come true. Even though they had been talking for several months now, just being in his presence was a totally different experience and so incredibly wonderful. Lando couldn't help but think of all the doubts he had, and how stupid he was too think of them. How could he, when Max had already proved himself to be perfect?

Finally they found some parking near the coffee shop and got out of the car. Lando locked his car and they walked towards the coffee shop. Lando found himself analyzing Max's every movement, as if not too forget about any of them. He noticed the way Max walked, the way Max moved his hand when he was explaining something. It was mesmerizing, watching him just exist so near Lando.

They finally got to the coffee shop, and moved for the register. The thought out loud about what they were going to get. Lando had never been a coffee or tea drinker, but he was willing to get one if Max did.

"Hi, welcome to Costa! How may I take your order?"

"Hi, can we have a small mocha for me, and..."

"I'll have a latte with a croissant," Max finished.

"Okay, your total is £10.52," the woman said. She smiled at them while Lando gave her his card.

"On a first date?"

Lando coughed. "Uh, yeah, can you tell?"

"Just a guess. Your order will be right out," she said to them.

They walked to take a table, and sat across from each other.

"How did she know?" Lando looked at Max in disbelief.

"Maybe it's because you look so enamoured with me," Max joked.

"Not funny," Lando said, despite cracking a smile.

Max looked at him with his beautiful blue eyes. "How did you sleep last night?"

Lando stiffened slightly. "Terrible," he said honestly.

"Why?" Max was looking at him curiously.

"I didn't go to bed until four am, then I had the worst nightmare," Lando answered.

"What about?"

Lando took in a sharp breath, not sure if he wanted to share his dream from last night. "It was about us, meeting."

"Where you said you weren't gay? Or something like that," Max said. "I had the same dream."

Lando looked up at him in disbelief. "Really?"

"Yeah, it was pretty awful," Max said.

Lando pondered for a second. Hope could they have the same dream? Was it a prophecy that they wouldn't work out? Was it a sign that things would be awkward? Was Max actually playing him? Or was he playing Max...

Lando pushed away those thoughts. He just wanted to have a normal day where he didn't constantly think about everything that worried him.

"What are you thinking about?"

Lando looked at Max, a flash of worry on his face. What if he was reading his mind? What if he was waiting for the right time to say he wasn't gay? What if-

"Oh, nothing really," Lando answered.

"You sure do seem to think a lot," Max said teasingly.

"Yeah, I just have a lot of thoughts," Lando said, feeling small. He didn't want to tell Max about his overthinking problem, or how he was overthinking right now. That would be weird, wouldn't it? If he just told Max about how much he overthinks everything. Lando didn't know what was weird and what wasn't anymore.

Their order got called, and Lando went up to go grab it. Max was looking at him with a smile on his face when he came back, balancing two cups and a croissant. He gave the latte and croissant to Max, and took a sip of his mocha.

Lando made a face. Max laughed at him.

"What? Do you not like it?"

"I don't usually drink coffee," Lando answered. "This is... very coffee."

"Well, the mocha enhances the coffee flavor, so I'm not surprised you don't like it," Max said, taking a sip of his latte.

Lando grimaced at his coffee, and tentatively took another sip. It felt acrid on his tongue, like some kind of acid. The chocolate was nice, but there was so much chocolateness that he could barely stand it.

He shouldn't have tried to impress Max by getting a coffee. He wasn't enjoying it at all. Sure, it was kind of sweet, but it was so much flavor that Lando couldn't help but cough after every sip. He should have just gotten tea.

"You don't have to drink it, you know," Max said, looking at Lando's distraught face.

"I bought it," Lando said quietly. "I don't want to get up to ask for something else."

"What would you want if you did?"

"Just some herbal tea," Lando said.

Max smiled at him, then got up. "Let me order for you," he said.

"Oh, please don't, I don't need it, I can drink this-"

"We both know you aren't going to drink it, so why pretend to?"

Lando watched as Max went up to the register and bought an herbal tea for Lando. He looked on in shock that Max would do that for him. Why would he do that for him? He had nothing to gain by doing that. Did he just want to be nice? Lando wasn't so sure about Max's intentions, but quickly pushed them away. Max didn't have intentions for him, he must just be a nice person! That's it, not anything more.

Max came back to the table and sat down. He grabbed Lando's cup and put it next to his. "You don't have to drink this anymore," Max said.

"What are you going to do with it?"

"Probably drink it," Max said. "So much for not having a caffeine rush today."

Lando smiled weakly, still thinking about why Max would go out of his way to buy something for him. Was Lando being ungrateful? He hoped not. He was just curious.

Lando looked up at Max and saw that he was looking off into the distance, as if he was staring at something going to shit. He couldn't quite put a finger on his expression. Was it loneliness? Was it anger? Was it confusion? It was something weird, and that's all Lando could tell.

"What's wrong?" Lando tilted his head.

Max looked at him quickly. "Oh, nothing. Just thinking."

"I guess we both have a lot of thinking," Lando said. Max laughed lightly and stared down at his croissant.

"You want this? I'm not hungry," Max said, motioning towards his croissant.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I don't know why I got it anyway," Max said. He pushed it towards Lando.

Lando picked it up, then took a small bite. It was getting colder, but still crispy and buttery. Lando liked croissants, and it was nice to have one now.

The woman called for his tea, and Max got up to grab it. He came back with the cup and put it in front of Lando carefully. Lando blew on it, then took a careful sip.

The tea was much better than the coffee. It tasted like floral water, something that Lando could get behind. It was almost too hot to drink, but the perfect temperature nonetheless.

Lando out down his tea and noticed Max looking at him expectantly.

"It's good," he said. "I like it."

"I'm glad," Max said. "Now you can drink something you actually like."

Lando smiled, and took another sip of his tea. It wasn't perfect, but he liked it better than the mocha. Lando watched as Max took a sip from his latte, then a sip from Lando's mocha. Max noticed him staring and smiled at him.

"Don't worry about me, just keep drinking," Max said.

Lando did. It was warm and inviting. He was quite enjoying the tea, even though he wasn't a tea drinker. He held it in his hands, wanting to extract its warmth. 

Lando looked up at Max, studying him. He was so pretty. Lando could barely comprehend how someone so pretty ended up in his life, but here he was, being with the pretty person who stole his heart. It was crazy, how everything worked out like this. How he could be here drinking tea with the one he loved most. How they were in the same country. 

Max finished the rest of his latte, and started drinking the mocha. Lando took another bite from the croissant, diving deep into its buttery center. It was nice, just being together on a cloudy afternoon in this cafe. Even though they weren't talking, it was just nice existing with each other in this space. Lando felt like he was on top of the world for the first time in his life.

Lando finished the croissant, and Max finished his coffee. Max got up, fixing his jacket and his hair. Lando got up as well, holding the tea close to him.

"Let's get out of here," Max said, a careful smile on his lips.

Lando nodded, and they walked towards the exit.

\---

They were in Lando's flat, sitting on his couch a fair distance apart. Lando thought it would be awkward if he immediately tried to sit next to Max, and Max clearly didn't mind. They were somewhat close, but not touching each other. Lando flipped through some channels, thinking about the past day in detail.

He landed on a random comedy show, and stuck to it. Lando didn't really watch TV, so it wasn't something he really cared about. He didn't know if Max would like it, or if he even watched TV, but when he looked over at Max he seemed to be okay. Lando settled into the couch, grabbing his tea from the table and taking a sip. It was starting to get cold, which Lando didn't like, but he knew that he'd just have to drink it quickly before it went completely cold. 

"Liking the show?" Lando looked over to Max to gauge his reaction. 

"Oh, yeah," Max said, looking distracted. "I'm not really watching it to be honest."

"Well, that's okay, neither am I," Lando said, cracking a nervous laugh.

Lando looked down at his tea, suddenly feeling very awkward. Was he supposed to do something? Flirt? Anything? He wanted to be as close to Max as possible, but he didn't want to be too much. He didn't know what to do, in all honesty. He could stretch and put an arm around Max. Or he could lean against him. 

It was all so confusing and weird to think about.

Lando decided to do the latter, carefully propping himself so he could comfortably do it, then laid his head on Max's shoulder. He didn't want to seem awkward, and he was afraid he would come off that way. 

Max accepted it, allowing Lando to put his face in the crook of Max's neck. Lando was smiling softly, enjoying the sensation of being as close to Max as he could. Max then put his arm around Lando, and Lando felt like he was in heaven. It was so tantalizing, being this close to Max, smelling him and feeling him.

"Are you comfortable?" Max laughed a little as Lando buried further into his neck.

"Honestly? No," Lando said. "My neck hurts."

"Here," Max said. He positioned himself to be against the side of the couch, and motioned for Lando to lay on his chest. Lando did as he was told, and collapsed into Max's chest. He was so incredibly comfortable laying against his chest. His heart started to race as he felt Max's warmth against him. It was magical.

He took another sip from his tea, then put it down on the table. He then snuggled into Max's chest, shutting his eyes in bliss.

"Comfortable now?" Max was speaking softly to him, as if not to disturb him.

"Yes," Lando replied.

They stayed like that for a while, just watching the shitty programming and relaxing into each other. Lando had never felt more relaxed in his life. He was so relaxed he didn't even realize that Max was putting an arm around him. Lando felt extremely safe in that moment.

"Am I too heavy for you? I'm sorry I didn't ask before-"

"No, you're fine. Just relax," Max said. Lando let himself relax again. He was able to hear Max's heartbeat underneath his shirt. It was somewhat comforting, feeling it pulse, as if it helped him know Max was alive and real and actually here.

Lando decided to break the silence. "I've been so worried about you coming here, and if you would like me, that I never really had time to relax."

Lando could feel Max smiling, even though he wasn't even looking up at him. He continued.

"I just worry about everything, all the time. And it gets so stressful that I can't sleep. I feel like I've been worrying the whole time we've been together."

Lando listened to Max breathe. It was even, in and out, over and over. Lando shut his eyes to fully take it in.

"I've been the same."

Lando opened his eyes abruptly. "Really?"

"Yeah. Sometimes I'd worry that you didn't like me either. It would get to me so bad I wouldn't get out of bed. I'm lucky I even took a shower before coming here." Max laughed a bit at that last part. Lando wondered if it was nervous laughter or not.

Lando just laid there, not answering. Max had been thinking about him like that? Why would Lando not like him? He thought it was so obvious that he was head over heels for Max. I guess to Max it wasn't like that.

"I'd get so sad thinking about all the things you might say to me, thinking you might hurt me," Max said. He was rubbing Lando's back now, drawing circles with his thumb.

"I would never hurt you!" Lando's voice was raised, but he quickly cowered down out of sight. He cursed at himself for his outburst, thinking that he was getting too worked up. Why did he say that when he could have said anything else? Just telling him that he wouldn't hurt him wasn't going to be enough to stop those fears. Lando knew that well enough.

"I would never hurt you," he said quieter. He clung to Max like he was a blanket, hiding his face in his chest.

"I can see that now. You couldn't hurt a fly," Max teased. Lando rolled his eyes and mimed a punch at Max. Max laughed hard, his voice vibrating through his chest. Lando just listened, smiling.

The next thing Lando knew was Max was pressing a kiss into his hair. Lando looked up and decided to do something he might regret later. Something he wasn't completely sure about, but right now wasn't the time to do things that made sense. Right now wasn't the time to make perfect decisions.

Lando kissed Max. It was soft and oh so lovely. Max's lips were just like Lando had dreamed. Lando found himself putting his arms around Max's neck to hold on for more support. Max gripped his waist, wrapping his arms all around it. They kissed for a long time, Max taking the lead and sucking gently on Lando's lower lip. Lando melted into it, letting himself feel all of Max, his chest, his lips, everything. For a few minutes it felt like they were connected, floating above everything else.

Max broke off the kiss, and they stayed in that position, foreheads and noses against each other. It was an intimate moment, shared only by the two of them. Lando opened his eyes and looked into Max's. They were such an alluring blue, and Lando could see all his emotions laid out for him. His doubts, his insecurities, his happiness. The one thing he could see the most of was his love for Lando. It was so clear, Lando wondered why he hadn't seen it before.

They kissed again, putting more movement in their bodies as they really got into the kiss. It was attractive, the way they moved against each other. It was so smooth and fluid, the way Lando's hands curled into Max's hair, and the way Max moved his hands to touch, feel all of Lando. By the time they had finished, they were laying on their sides, faced towards one another. Lando had his arm underneath Max's neck and another one lazily on Max's shoulder. Max had his arm around Lando's waist, the other trapped between them. Maybe it wasn't the most comfortable position, but it made Lando feel so incredibly close to Max. 

They laid like this, occasionally kissing each other, holding each other and feeling the other breathe. It was perfect, the way the night would end, with them in each other's arms.

None of them would trade it for the world.

**Author's Note:**

> i can't believe I wrote almost 5000 words! This is by far the longest thing I've ever written in one go. I love this ship to death, and I cannot stop writing it! Lando and Max have such a dynamic that it makes me really happy to see these two in a relationship type situation.


End file.
